


Bliss

by fuwa-fuwa-gem (gemmalianne)



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: M/M, Shiroba - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-27
Updated: 2014-08-27
Packaged: 2018-02-15 00:37:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2209065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gemmalianne/pseuds/fuwa-fuwa-gem
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Koujaku's bad ending, Aoba is suffering with the other Aoba's consciousness that is still within him, and his feelings towards Koujaku.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bliss

I woke up crying. I’m not sure why. It’s not like me at all to do something like that. Maybe it was because of the dream that I’d had.

A dream about Koujaku.  
But not my beautiful Koujaku.  
His Koujaku.

It was a dream, or maybe just a memory of something that had happened a long time ago when we were both children, but that had long been buried in the darkest depths of my mind. It must be because of him. The other me. I don’t know why, but it feels like he’s been getting stronger recently. What a nerve! As if I’ll let him have the chance to come back. He repressed me for so long, kept me caged. I won’t let him put me back there again. This is my time. This is my Koujaku. I’m the one that accepted him and gave him everything he wanted. In return, I’m getting what I want. A slow burning destruction, passionate and satisfying. I love it. I love it very much. I want it to go on forever. I want to see him. I want him now.

I can hear the clink of his restraints as he pulls against the chains to try and peek through the metal bars of his cell. He knew it was me even in the darkness of his prison.

“Did you miss me?” I ask with a playful laugh.

I wonder if he longs for me as much as I do for him, but I can already see his answer. His cock his completely erect, waiting for me to wrap my thighs around his muscular body. I’m not ready yet though. I always like to have a little foreplay before I let him fuck me ragged, but he always has his way in the end. I don’t know if he appreciates my body at all, but he likes the way it tastes, and that’s fine by me.

“Grrraaaah!”

He growls at me, desperately wanting me to come closer. That sound, like some sort of wild beast, starts to get me hard. I loosen my robe and let it hang from my naked pale body. The sight of me like this stirs him up further. His arms tense as he tries desperately to break free of his shackles so he can grab me, grope me, tear me to pieces. I’m lucky those restraints are strong. He may have killed me if he were free of them, and I don’t want that. Not yet. I want my fun first.

“Have you been good?”

I reach out my fingers and put them in his mouth. He bites them, nibbles, and laps up the blood from the fresh wounds that he makes.

“That hurts Koujaku,” I say, but with a smile.

I like this. This pain is good. The fact that Koujaku is the one inflicting it on me makes it feel even better. I trace my fingers over his tongue and the warm wetness of it arouses me further. I can’t wait any longer and I bring myself closer to him. He spits out my bloody fingers and takes my entire cock into his mouth. My body shudders and I can’t stifle the gasps of pleasure, even as he grazes me with those fangs of his, drawing blood. This is bliss. I love my Koujaku. I really do. I want him to feel it too. I squat down over his throbbing erection. My body wants him and takes him in without too much trouble. I’ve grown used to his size and it’s no longer the struggle that it once was. Still, as he thrusts himself deeper inside of me, I can’t help but clench my teeth and hold onto him tightly. As he bites into my shoulder, I drag my nails across his back with a smile upon my face. The deep red petals painted permanently across his skin remind me of dark globs of blood bubbling up, not unlike my own blood that is pouring out of the wounds he punctures into my once porcelain-like skin with his teeth. It hurts, but I can take it. I want it. My world becomes a haze of pleasure as Koujaku pounds into me faster and harder. I can’t think. I can’t speak. I’m going to come soon. I close my eyes.

And I remember him smiling down at me with his kind face. Koujaku, my hero. My protector. My childhood friend. The hairdresser. The romantic. The man who would do anything “since it’s for you, Aoba.”

I angrily push myself away from him, stumbling backwards onto the floor. His fangs drag at my flesh as he tries to stop me, cutting into me more. I still come all over my stomach, it was too late to stop, but what the hell was that? Why did I think of that? The old Koujaku. Those memories belong to the other Aoba, they have no place with me. I accepted Koujaku. I love all of him, especially the darkest parts. Would the other Aoba have done the same? His scrap failed and he couldn’t protect the friend he had always claimed to care for. I would never let Koujaku down like that. I love him. 

I look up to see my lover sitting there unsatisfied. He can’t pleasure himself with his hands tied behind his back.

“Koujaku.”

I can’t do this right now. I fix my robe and leave the cell, covered in blood and come. Before I go, I glance back at him, his cock still hard and wet, his open mouth dripping with blood-tainted drool, his wide crimson eyes still full of lust.

“I’m sorry Koujaku. I’ll see you again soon.”

I ask Toue not to call on me for anything today and go back to my room. I strip off, clean myself up a little, then stand in front of the full length mirror, admiring all of the wounds and scars that my lover has inflicted upon me. He’s really made me his own. My body has been savaged by him. It’s beautiful. As beautiful as the scars that adorn Koujaku’s body. I’m getting hard as I think about him, but I can’t go and see him again today. For whatever reason, the other Aoba is getting stronger and I need to beat him back down. I won’t let him take control. I’ll never let him hurt me or Koujaku again.

But this isn’t what Koujaku wants.

I almost felt as though I had been punched in the stomach.

“What do you know about what Koujaku wants? You were too weak to save him.” I snarl at my reflection. “I’m the one who accepted him. I’m the one who really loves him.”

I love Koujaku. There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do for him. But as I think that, I realize that it is that very feeling of love that is weakening me. I want to give that caged beast true happiness. I want him to feel the bliss that I feel when I’m with him. Those feeling are too pure for my destructive heart. They are from him, the other Aoba.

Koujaku wanted me to accept him, but how could I do that when I wouldn’t even accept myself? I didn’t understand before. I’m sorry. I see it clearly now. You and I are not enemies. I’m sorry I pushed you away for so long.

I’d wanted to hear those words so many times. I had always wanted to be accepted by Aoba. I was the same as Koujaku. Wasn’t I just a caged beast too? The tears came again as I remembered how he would smoke his skinny cigarettes on my veranda. Or the way that he would reach out to touch my hair, then stop because he knew that it would hurt me. He’s right. This isn’t what Koujaku wanted. Koujaku never would have wanted to hurt me, but my reflection in the mirror is covered in scars, all from Koujaku. I wasn’t accepting him at all. I was repressing him, bringing out the beast in him to fulfil my own destructive desires, leaving him to wallow in self-hatred and despair for the crimes he had committed in his past. This wasn’t love. How can I give him real love when I am nothing more than a fragment of my own self? But I wanted to love him. I wanted to love him far more than I wanted to hurt the other Aoba and that feeling was burning in me now.

I’m sorry. I can accept you now. You and I are one. Come back to me. I’m not afraid any more.

I smile as the salty tears rush down my face. “Me either, Aoba. Thank you.”

I unlock the cell door. Koujaku was pulling at his restraints again as he always did, panting hard. He wanted to pounce on me. He was probably still feeling unsatisfied from earlier. That was my fault, and I hesitate, wondering what he might do to me if I get too close now. My body is still sore, but Koujaku wouldn’t care about that. He just wanted me to finish what I had started. I’d just have to accept it. I step closer and Koujaku, salivating as a low growl vibrates in his throat, tries to pull towards me. Exhaling, I reach out to him, wrapping my slim arms around his neck. He pushes his erection into my ass without remorse and I cry out, my eyes watering. The other me was used to this pain. He’d lived with pain for so long. Nothing could ever hurt him as much as I did when I pushed him away. Now I’m the one hurting, but I hold on to Koujaku tightly. I won’t let go now. I will never push him away again.

“Koujaku,” I gasp. “Koujaku. I love you. And I know you’re in there. Don’t give up. Never give up, Koujaku.”

My words are almost lost as he thrusts roughly into me, but he suddenly stops. Is he hesitating?

“A-a-a-o-ba?”

I can’t stop the tears that fall from my eyes. I can barely breathe after hearing him say my name, and I hold him close.

“It’s me Koujaku,” I sob. “I’m sorry. I love you. I’m so sorry.”

Koujaku doesn’t move for a moment as I weep onto his bare shoulder, but then I feel his face press deeply against my skin. It begins to feel wet, but the lack of any pain means that it isn’t my blood. It is Koujaku’s tears. I lift my head to look at him, and he looks back deeply into my eyes. I see the crimson beginning to fade, and a hint of gold reappears. These are Koujaku’s eyes. My Koujaku’s eyes.

“A-oba,” he says again.

“I’m here,” I say as I kiss his damp cheek. “I’m here now. And I’ll never leave you again. This time we will be together. I love you, Koujaku. I’m so sorry that I put you through all this. I really love you.”

With his head bowed, I feel his body soften and he gently pulls himself out of me. I can’t be sure, but his tattoo looks a little different, like it’s retreating to his back after it once consumed most of his body. I don’t focus on it too much. I want to see his face. His eyes don’t look so fierce anymore, and he rests his head down on my lap. I stroke his vibrant red hair and he relaxes. I think he might go to sleep like that, so I shift into a comfortable position and close my eyes too. This is true bliss. To be comfortable with the one you love. To feel their warm skin against your own. To know that they are at peace with you, as you are with them. That’s how Koujaku makes me feel, and it makes my heart swell with happiness.

“I love you Koujaku.” I say, placing a delicate kiss on his face.

“I love you, Aoba.”

It’s the first time in a long time that he has actually spoken, and his voice brings more tears to my eyes. I will definitely stay with Koujaku. I will free him, and not even Toue will stop me.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first fic, and I know it's far from perfect, but I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for taking the time to read it :D


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